Funniest Bible Verse

The stupidest verse of the bible is a hard competition to win considering all the very capable contenders but, I think I may have a winner. In the book of numbers the author says “Now Moses was very humble—more humble than any other person on earth.” Numbers 12:3. Fine, this Moses chap may have been humble however, when you find out who wrote the book of numbers it makes a startling difference. The book of numbers is traditionally believed to have been written by–you guessed it the humblest man on Earth, Moses.

This really compliments the theists when the say first, that they are humble then follow it with things like; they know that god exists, they not only know that he exists but, they know who he is, what he wants and how he created the Universe. Humble? I don’t think so.

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14 Comments

Filed under atheist, bible, creationism, opinion, religion

14 responses to “Funniest Bible Verse

  1. cornishevangelist

    Angels are made subject unto us

    Angels are subject unto you, that means they are to obey your orders when you tell them to retrieve the promises of God. Also they are to be used to attack spiritual and earthly problems that afflict you in your life. But they will only obey you, if you are a child of God, for then you have the authority to use the name of Jesus.
    Now, Jesus said that the spirits are subject unto you, in St Luke 10v20, “ notwithstanding in this rejoice not that the spirits are subject unto you”. Jesus was speaking of evil spirits at that time. But we also know that He meant angel spirits, for it is written in Hebrews 1v7, “ and of the angels He saith, Who maketh His angels spirits.”
    Now the evil spirits will not obey you, because they are evil. We can see this in the example of where the disciples tried to cast out an evil spirit, which refused to go, then they had to go to Jesus for Him to cast out the demon.
    Now angel spirits are very good and obedient to God’s Word. They know that Jesus has made them subject unto us and so they will always obey us. For they were created to obey and glorify Christ.

    Angels Everywhere
    Oh, if we could only see into the unseen world, then we would not be so fearful of this life. Elisha the prophet of God prayed for his servant that God would open his eyes, and when his servant saw the heavens full of chariots of fire he was no longer afraid.
    Many years ago there was a lady in a little Pentecostal Church in Cornwall who was afraid of living alone in her flat, so when Diane and I took her home after Church, we prayed for angels all around her flat, and in every room and cupboard. Her faith rose up in her so much, it was as if she saw angels everywhere, and all fear and loneliness left her. Oh, if only we would believe.
    “The angel of the Lord encampeth around about them that fear Him, and delivereth the,” {Psalm 34 v 7}. Praise the Lord!
    EVANGELIST BILLY BOLITHO

  2. Robert Donohoe

    What a load on nonsense!

  3. Jay

    This is rather tasteless. Posting a link that is insulting to Christians. Why do you feel you have to put down the beliefs of another? Where is the “tolerence” people like you so often like to talk about?

    • steve

      Many people have ever right to defend themselves for all of the terrible things that the Bible has brought to they life. If you are one of the 144000 people that is going to heaven fine, but I doubt that you are. So, until their Bible and laws are no longer being forced in our faces, and their respect others, they will just have to keep the evil alive.

  4. Robert Donohoe

    Jay, why is it insulting to Christians? Is their god so weak that he can’t take a bit of mocking? Are their beliefs so weak that they feel threatened? Why can’t I mock their religion–why does it deserve any more respect than any other view like politics. They don’t seem to keen on leaving my beliefs alone they insist on telling me that I am going to burn forever in a pit of fire. So on balance I think I am being rather kind.

    Regards,

    Robert

  5. A Christian

    Robert, since when does knowledge coincide with arrogance? I, as a chemistry major in college, would say that I know quite a bit about chemistry. That does not make me arrogant, but — get this — truthful. If Moses was humble, to say anything less would be unacceptable. Be careful, then, when you argue against someone’s self-analysis and proceed to consider yourself “rather kind.” Or, for that matter, to consider your argument valid, which you quite obviously imply… You have no more call to say such about yourself than Moses did.

    • steve

      I guess it depends on whether you knew the subject naturaly or had to learn it from a Book someone right. If you simply learned it and actually every word written, but would allow for new knowledge, progress and exspantion, Than yes that would be considered arrogant. If you know truth or allow room for future exsperience and knowledge to come and allow change and growth…..no. I, like billions of other homosexuals that have ever existed, know that being gay is not a sin or wrong. We know by experience. Not because the same group that started this nonsense still happens to be stagnant in such.

  6. Robert Donohoe

    A. Christian (if that is your real name) 🙂 ,
    Arrogance to does not coincide with arrogance per se but, when used in the way I was satiring it does take on an arrogance.

    You say that you know things about chemistry great I assume if you were telling me about them that you would use logical arument to explain a chemistry principle might not be arrogant but, if you told me that it was reveled to you know everything about chemistry better than me but cannot demonstrate to me that you do know more than me then you are arrogant.

    I don’t think that Moses existed at least how he is discribed in his books but, similar to Cassis Clay aka Muhammad Ali a man who went on and on about how he was the greatest fighter in the world or universe which he may have been; that might be a fact but, it was still arrogance.

    Now a humble person may deny that they are the best in the world even if it were true by virtue of the fact that they are humble.

    Robert

  7. Jack

    If I remember correctly, wasn’t the Word of God inspired by God? If that is correct, we can conclude that it was not Moses saying these things about himself, but God speaking through him.

    • steve

      Who is to say that that “GOD” doesn’t speak through of of us, and always have. Moses was a murderer and therefore not a saint at all. He could have just killed you for not believing in his Holy Bable.

  8. Adam

    Jack, are you serious? The way you worded your response is the exact reason I turned away from Christianity as a religion. Inspired by God does in no way mean that he was speaking through Moses, it means that God was INSPIRING Moses and Moses was interpreting what was being INSPIRED upon him. Moses was human, as are you and I. Humans, as a species, lie constantly, directly or indirectly. And please, don’t give me the blind faith story if you read this post either.

  9. Brianna

    2 Timothy 3:16 “All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness” Actually Adam, it was God speaking through Moses. The Bible is God’s word, not Mose’s or any other author in the Bible. It says in 2 Timothy that it’s God breathed, which also means inspired. Moses was simply writing down the words that God was speaking to him.

  10. Ph.D philosopher

    I am making no claim as to any religious beliefs or preferences, but I do claim, as a Ph.D in philosophy, that so many posts here lack full disclosure of truth and honesty in their content and intent.

    Regarding the “funniest verse of the Bible”, it’s so typical with Robert’s out-of-context biblical postings. His hate for things Christian clouds his ability to be fully honest with his references. Numbers 12:3 that he claims is the “funniest verse in the Bible” really points to his ignorance (or perhaps purposeful omission) of Scripture. To understand the proper context of the verse, you must understand the scenario that precedes it.

    In the midst of all the things God was doing for the people of Israel in the wilderness, they compared the benefits of living in Egypt under slavery conditions with the irritations of this new nomadic life, and were not pleased with the God-led life. They constantly complained. The people wanted meat, and God provided so much quail that the ones who grumbled about “nothing but manna” got sick from eating quail. Joshua, who had been with Moses since youth, was irritated when two elders who hadn’t obeyed their summons prophesied just the same as the ones who HAD obeyed. Miriam, involving her brother Aaron, wanted a geater share of credit for God speaking through them. But when God spoke to them, answering their complaint, He pointed out the difference between a normal prophet – instructed through visions and dreams – and humble Moses who actually sees the form of God when they speak together.

    The reference to Moses being the “most humble of all the men on earth” was a literary allusion by the author of the book of Numbers (some believe it to be Moses while others think it may be others; it is highly unlikely–given what we know about Moses and his other writings–he would have written that he was the most humble man on the face of the earth).

    In fact, “most humble” is only one of several translations of עָנָ֣יו, (anah) which in Hebrew can be translated as “poor”, “afflicted”, and “meek.”

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